


Tom Nook is a Little Bitch

by hold_my_applejuice



Category: Star Wars
Genre: Badass Boyfriends, Dungeons & Dragons References, Eventual Smut, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Gaming Store, Getting to Know Each Other, I’ve lost control, M/M, Magic The Gathering - Freeform, More tags to be added, Not canon to characters, Now it’s got action, Self-Indulgent, Slow Burn, collegeAU, hutt cartel, lots of Stereotypes, some guns, the good kinds
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-29
Updated: 2020-05-15
Packaged: 2021-02-28 21:29:30
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 7,792
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23373946
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hold_my_applejuice/pseuds/hold_my_applejuice
Summary: Hux paused a moment, watching as Kylo shuffled both the decks as he tried to decide if this was an absolute waste of time or not. Making his decision, he sat at the table and said, “It’s a strategy game, right? If I win then I get the job.” He hadn’t waited for Kylo’s response, and didn’t react to the downright mischievous grin that grew over Kylo’s face.“Whatever you say, your majesty.”
Relationships: Armitage Hux/Kylo Ren
Comments: 15
Kudos: 41





	1. Tommy Nook sets the plot

**Author's Note:**

> This is so self indulgent it hurts. My first fic ever and its just, fluff and sass. I’ll be honest, I didn’t think that was how this was gunna go but here we are, I still think it’s cute. Also if you know me irl it’ll be really obvious that I wrote it because yes, I too worked at a gaming store, so if you don’t say anything I won’t say anything. And yes, this whole idea was inspired by Tom Nook from Animal Crossing, he’s a DILF and I’ll fight you on that.

Flustered would certainly be one way to describe Hux when he received what had appeared to be an ordinary letter in the mail. Plain, it blended in with the rest of his bills for three days before he had finally sat to go through them in his usually orderly fashion. In fact, usually it would have been opened sooner but with the recent death of his father, may his soul rest in hell, he had allowed himself to fall a bit behind. A mistake he cursed himself for as he read over the letter for the fourth time stating his brand new $200,000 debt that was apparently his father’s final parting gift. Bastard.

Brendol was involved in some shady shit. That much Hux knew without even needing to be around the guy. First Order Weapons was a global name, and no one managed to get their fingers into that many people’s business without some unsavory dealings. There wasn’t a name attached, only a thinly veiled threat and a number to contact. Evidently whoever wrote him had assumed he still had access to his father’s funds, as if he would let anyone near his precious company. 

One thing was certain, however. Hux was going to need to get a job. Which really was a pity, having just quit his last one at the university mail room after finally scraping the coin to pay the rest of his tuition. He was already beginning the calculations. He briefly considered skipping town, trying to weasel out of it. But he was months away from graduating, and he had put in so much work these past years to make it on his own. Besides, the people Brendol dealt with were far from fools and there was no guarantee he wouldn’t be found.

He was still running through scenarios as he handed in applications and resumes to Starbucks, Subway, Barnes and Noble, anywhere that might hire a broke college kid on a whim. He walked into the campus gaming store, a bright place he normally wouldn’t be caught dead in but oh, he was desperate, starting his typical “hire me” spiel without even looking to see the figure manning the register.

“Hello, my name is Armitage Hux and I am hoping to apply-” he stopped mid sentence as he finally glanced down from his papers and saw the hulking form of Kylo Ren lounging on a ratty old chair, who was startled out of some midday nap. 

“Hux? From English?” He stood from his seat and leaned forward across the counter onto his toned forearms.

“Well, yes and this is clearly a mistake, so I’ll be going.”

“Hold up, what’s the rush? I thought you were looking for a job.”

“Not your problem!”

“Is this about the laptop? I got you that new one after, and said I was sorry.”

This was enough to get Hux to freeze and stiffen, bell ringing dimly as he stood half out the door. “No, you didn’t. Apologize, that is.” He met Kylo’s gaze accusingly. 

“Oh well then. Uhm. Sorry.” Kylo looked up at the quieting bell as it fell still, and when Hux didn’t respond he added, “I can get a little angry sometimes, I suppose.”

“You threw my personal laptop at the wall, in which it had basically shattered on impact! You’re lucky I kept backups of my files.” Hux frowned but stepped back into the shop, apparently sated by the apology and setting the bell off ringing again. 

“I mean, maybe if you had let me help even a little bit,”

“We got an A, didn’t we?” Hux snapped back, feeling a small thrill of victory as Ren fell silent at that. 

Kylo took a moment to just stare at this wiry, cocky little figure of a man before shaking his head and asking, “Do you want a job or what?” He let his weight lean onto one leg and eyebrow quirk at the question, and Hux was suddenly reminded as to the other reason why he had vowed after that project to cut Kylo Ren out of his life.

Kylo Ren was extremely, unfairly attractive and damn it, he knew it too. 

Hux huffed, about to refuse before remembering that the debt wasn’t going to pay itself and the sooner he could get any sort of income, the better. Besides, he could always just quit as soon as he got a better offer. 

Hux took the few purposeful steps up to the counter and placed his resume down in front of him, who picked up the page but never took his eyes off of Hux’s face. “As you can see, I’ve maintained my average on the highest honor roll, take part in regular service activities in the community and have plenty of experience in sorting and packing from,”

“I don’t care.” Kylo interrupted Hux midway through his rant, tossing the resume back towards Hux indifferently. Hux sputtered a moment, trying to regain his composure and Kylo continued. “Can you tell me what edition of Dungeons and Dragons is the most current? How many types of mana are in Magic the Gathering? How many keys do you need to win a game of Keyforge? What’s the difference between a legacy game and the normal one?” Kylo pressed on, question after question as Hux paled and then began growing a reddish patch of blush on his face. A moment later, hearing no response, he prompted, “Well?”

Hux’s mind worked overtime, it was a quiz, wasn’t it? Perhaps he could solve it with some common sense, he glanced around the store as if expecting the walls to reveal some answer upon them. They didn’t.

Kylo let Hux struggle for another breath, before giving a small chuckle at the redhead. “Have you ever even played a board game?”

Hux’s silence said everything Kylo needed to know, but instead of further teasing as Hux had expected he simply pulled out two decks of cards and sat at one of the gaming tables across from the counter, putting one of the decks at the seat across from him. “Come on, if you’re trying to get hired you’re going to need to know the rules and besides, it seems like you could use a break.”

Hux paused a moment, watching as Kylo shuffled both the decks as he tried to decide if this was an absolute waste of time or not. Making his decision, he sat at the table and said, “It’s a strategy game, right? If I win then I get the job.” He hadn’t waited for Kylo’s response, and didn’t react to the downright mischievous grin that grew over Kylo’s face.

“Whatever you say, your majesty.” Kylo’s voice dripped with sarcasm as he cut Hux’s deck, indicating Hux should do the same to his. “Would you like to know the rules before, or after I hand your ass to you?”

“I’m a quick study, and anything you can wrap your head around can’t be that difficult.” Hux stuck to his guns, to which Kylo gave an exaggerated eye roll and dove into explaining the rules of Magic the Gathering.

As it turns out, there are five mana types in Magic, though technically in some cases colorless counts as the sixth, which seemed rather counterintuitive to Hux. His deck was green though, which was easy enough to comprehend once he got the turn orders and basic rules. Kylo played red, spells exploding and burning away Hux’s health counter faster than he could keep up. In the end, Hux thought he had a game-changer, having already adjusted his creatures to slow down Kylo’s fast attacks and put out a massive creature, one that took all his mana but was sure to trample his opponent that next turn.

“Damn, lucky pull.”

“Just take your turn so I can beat you already.”

Too bad for Hux, his confidence alone wasn’t enough to win him the game. Kylo revealed two instant spells that essentially neutralized his dinosaur and then delivered the final blow to his health. His fist clenched and his brow screwed up in anger, how DARE he, he had almost won that too,

“Good game, Hux.” Kylo was proud of his victory, though his smile wasn’t unkind. When Hux simply started stacking up the cards, he continued, “Really, you did good for your first time.”

“Yes well, I’ll see you never, hopefully.” This was a waste of time. Why he even bothered to let himself get distracted- he had much bigger things to be concerned with. 

“Wait, Hux. You caught on quick, and besides, I was using a deck I created myself so I knew it better. I can talk to my uncle, we’ve been looking for some extra help anyways. If you want the job, that is. I can, we can do that.”

Family owned shops always treat their workers pretty well. And being hired on the spot, that was tempting. But this whole thing was so far out of his comfort zone; there were things he could plan for, and then there was Kylo Ren.

“When do I start?”


	2. What’s Your Name Again?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hux is adjusting to his new job, which turns out to not be nearly as bad as he thought it might be. And though Kylo Ren does present some... challenges, he’s not completely awful to work with, right?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What’s poppin gamers! Installment two, coming up hot. I’m still having a lot of fun with it so I hope you are too! As usual, your comments and kudos feed me so if you can spare some words or advice I’d appreciate it! Love y’all!

As it turns out, a lot more went into working at that little store than Hux had given it credit for. The sheer number of games that existed in this community was bordering atrocious, but Kylo was patient and Hux learned quickly. Some of them were even a little fun, strategy games of battle and armies were particularly enthralling. He’d watch people come in groups and play, some nights complete strangers would sit down for a game. It was odd, but it was a neat little atmosphere, one he didn’t find he hated quite as much as he thought he did. 

Though he did feel Kylo took just a little too much satisfaction in making him cart the boxes of supply from the back. Today they got a larger shipment in and Hux internally groaned at the stack of six or seven boxes waiting for him, already knowing how sore his arms would be the next day.

“You need some help back there or what?”

“I’m perfectly capable!” Hux practically snapped back as he picked up the first box, lifting up from a squat to reduce strain on his back. Fuck, what were they even putting in these things, rocks? He glared at Kylo, who was lounging at one of the tables leafing through a gaming magazine. 

Kylo glanced up at Hux’s confident attitude before returning to his reading with a poorly hidden smile. Infuriating. 

Hux unpacked the box, documenting, pricing, and shelving each of the books it contained as Kylo only piped up to give advice on how to organize them occasionally. It was just the two of them at the moment, it tended to be pretty empty during the afternoon save for the occasional straggler looking for tabletop minis or a specific magic card. They existed in a comfortable silence, Of Mice and Men playing softly from the speakers. Hux continued that process for a bit, each box slowly being sorted and put away by the last few his muscles were straining, as he’d suspected they would, but it was doable. The last one wasn’t even all that bad, and he would have been fine if it weren’t for one oaf of a man getting in the way to muck things up. Turning the corner, Hux felt as if he had suddenly hit a wall and lost his footing, all but flinging the merchandise from his arms. He let out a small yelp in surprise that he would deny left his mouth later as a strong hand gripped his forearm and pulled him upright. The box crashed to the ground, dice clacking loudly as they hit the ground as if in annoyance. 

“Oh.” Oh??? OH??? Was that the best he could do? All but laying in Kylo’s arm like some damsel in those romance books, his ears reddened and face screwed up defensively. 

Of course, this was the moment that dreadful bell decided to go off, and a surly voice called in. “Well Benny, when you said you found new help this certainly wasn’t what I had in mind.”

Hux could’ve died on the spot. Melted into a pathetic little puddle and ceased to exist, never in his life had he been stuck in such a horribly embarrassing situation. The two of them jumped apart as if they’d been shocked, Hux all but hiding behind Kylo’s frame from the sudden intruder. 

“Uncle Luke, uhh, I didn’t know you would be, uhm, stopping by.”

Hux cursed Kylo, he couldn’t have made the situation worse if he had tried. Deciding to do what he could to salvage the situation he stepped forward, offering Luke a crisp handshake. “Pleasure to meet you Mr. Skywalker, and thank you so much for the job. It helps more than you can know, and your shop is truly a phenomenal one.” Okay, maybe he laid it on a little thick. He was flustered. It wasn’t his fault.

“And you must be Hux, isn’t that right? Seems only fair after that little incident with your laptop, I’m glad we could all get past that.” Hux shot a glance at Kylo, who just looked at him apologetically. 

“That’s right, hardly an issue in the end.” 

“Well then Hux, welcome to the store. I’m sure Kylo’s been showing you the ropes and all, it isn’t all too complicated I don’t think. Oh, and before I forget.” Luke pulls out a shirt from his bag, identical to that of which Kylo was wearing with the exception of the small embroidered name ‘Armitage Hux’ on the chest. “You’ll be needing that, keep it clean now. I was mostly stopping by to check in, but it doesn’t seem as if there’s too much to worry about for now, and I told Leia I’d meet her for dinner.”

Hux admired the shirt, surprised at the small flutter of pride that came with holding the simple uniform. “Thank you sir,” he replied as polite as he could, trying to erase what he had walked into just moments before.

He nodded, turning to Kylo. “Don’t let the place burn down. And oh-” he stopped and looked over his shoulder as he made his way out the door. “Try to stay focused while you’re on the clock, okay?” And with that, he was gone. 

There was a beat of silence where Hux stood mortified before Kylo erupted into laughter behind him. “I guess you’ve met Luke now,” he said between snickers.

“How on earth is this funny to you? That was my first impression with my boss and now he thinks the only reason I’m here is so you can snog me on your breaks!”

“Aww come on, that wouldn’t be too bad, would it?” Kylo broke into laughter again at that, a deep, smooth sound that carried through the empty store.

“You are- you’re unbelievable! He could fire me, there's absolutely nothing funny about it!”

“He gave you a shirt, didn’t he? That’s not something to do if you’re going to fire someone.” Kylo calmed down a bit and picked up the dropped box effortlessly, bringing it to the empty table. “It’s fine Hux, I promise.” 

“I’m going to go put this on.”

“Hurry back, you’re gunna need like 500 price stickers for all these dice.”

After changing his shirt, he saw how embarrassingly red his face still was in the small mirror and scowled at his reflection patting down his cheeks with cold water until they calmed down. He looked good in the shirt, he decided, if not extremely nerdy with the large sci-fi inspired logo on the back. He returned to the shop with a good deal more confidence, finding Kylo already at work labeling each of the dice sets with a price sticker. Hux grabbed a marker and sat down across from him, his labels neat and tidy next to Kylo’s scribble.

“Benny huh?” Hux kept his eyes glued to his task, but could practically feel Kylo shift in his seat. 

“What about it? You really think Kylo Ren was my real name?” This was a touchy subject, that much Hux could tell, but he couldn’t help but pry a little further.

“Well sure, it’s not like it’s any stranger than Armitage Hux.”

“Look I never needed to ask about your fake name, so why don’t you just drop it.”

“Armitage Hux is my real name.” Is this conversation real. Is this an actual conversation Hux is having with Kylo right now. Hux started to worry he’d actually fallen earlier and hit his head. 

“Oh. Well Ben Solo is mine.” That was the end of the conversation, Hux could tell. The sound of clicking dice filled the air, silence no longer quite so comfortable as it had been earlier. That name almost sounded familiar for some reason, but the more Hux tried to figure it out the more it eluded him so he eventually gave up. 

Pretty soon Hux’s shift was up, and after that day he was more than ready to collapse on his bed. Well, after he finished his two hours of slowly piling assignments. He had planned not having a job this semester, so he loaded on extra classes and was starting to regret it. Him and Kylo’s were just closing up when Kylo piped up again in a more conversational tone. 

“You know I’ve got this dnd group. It’s pretty fun, and my character is where I, well, got the name. We’ve been playing a while and he was just everything I wanted to be. So I became him.”

Hux did everything he could to keep a straight face. That had to be the nerdiest thing that had come out of Kylo’s mouth yet, which was impressive. He watched Kylo turning off the open sign, silently asking him to go on.

“It-It’s kinda hard to explain but, if you wanted to we do have room at the table. You could make a character and come play, to try it out. If you wanted.”

At this Hux was genuinely surprised, it was the first attempt either of them had made to turn their relationship to anything but coworkers. Playing a regular game, that almost put them in friendship territory. Hux wasn’t sure how to feel about that, but he found himself responding, “Sure, if the group wouldn’t mind.”

“Oh! Well are you free tomorrow? Maybe at four, we can make your character, it usually takes a little bit but it’ll go faster if I help out, you know?”

“My class lets out at three, so four should work. Should I bring anything?” He really didn’t have the time for this, but then again how could he refuse? He deserved a break, even if it was with this mountain of a man.

“Nope, just you! I’ll text you the address.” He opened the door for Hux, who walked through with a nod. 

“Tomorrow at four, then.”

“It’s a date.”


	3. It’s Not a Date.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kylo and Hux have a definitely not-a-date to work out the details of Hux’s new Dungeons and Dragons character he wants to play when joining Kylo’s group!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It’s,,, it’s just fluff. I’m sorry. I swear I’ll write something other than that soon I’m just,,, not ready yet.

Hux’s mind was spinning cartwheels. Had he heard that right? Kylo called it a date. It most certainly was not a date. Hux doesn’t do dates. Hux did meetings. This was just a meeting, to put together some character for a game he was only playing to solidify his place on the gaming store staff, especially after that little stunt with Kylo’s uncle. Somehow, this frame of logic did little to quell Hux’s anxieties as his bouncing leg shook his desk as he stared at the small clock attached to the wall. Class couldn’t end fast enough, and he found himself barely able to focus on the lecture, an issue he was quite unfamiliar with. 

Alas, after a quick shower and a walk across campus he found himself at the address Kylo had sent to him. He most certainly hadn’t spent any extra time gelling his hair, or applied that special lotion with the subtle linen scent he likes so much, or even given the quick swipe of a razor to any areas on his face that may have shown a whisper of stubble. But, even if he had, that was perfectly reasonable, this was a business meeting after all.

That sentiment was not aided in the least by the haggard appearance of Ren, standing in the doorway with coffee stained pajamas and a half eaten bagel hanging haphazardly out of his mouth. His bit down on the bagel, taking it out of his mouth and chewing it slowly, nodding to Hux’s crisp posture. After swallowing, he nodded slowly. He looked like he had just woken up.

“Hux.” It was a hello, clearly, but the simplicity of it almost annoyed Hux. This was not a date nor a meeting. This was a joke.

“Invite me in next time, would you?” Hux bristled, all but pushing past Kylo into the apartment. Kylo snorted in response, which did little but cause Hux’s displeasure to increase. This was embarrassing, for the both of them. He perched himself on the edge of a plush brown couch, seeing DnD books and papers sprawled on the small table in front of him. At least he hadn’t forgotten. 

“A ray of sunshine, as always.” Kylo crashed into the couch next to him, shoving an unholy amount of bagel into his mouth and not even bothering to finish chewing before asking, “So do you have any ideas for what you wanna play?”

If Hux’s scowl could have grown deeper, it would have. As it was, he gave an exhausted glare before relenting. “Definitely not strength based. Maybe a dex character? I’m not much fond of the ‘hit it till it’s dead’ tactics.”

“Hmmm. Bard?”

“Absolutely not.”

“We could get you a funny little hat.”

“No”

“You could sing epic tales of the epically handsome knight Kylo Ren!” He let his arms raise and flexed them, striking an epically dorky heroic pose.

“Stop that, you’re embarrassing yourself.” Even as he said it his eyes contradicted him, wandering down and picking apart the toned definition of his arms he proudly displayed. Kylo, not blind himself, noticed and promptly swung a carefree arm around Hux’s shoulders in a loose chokehold, gesturing wildly with the other.

“Sir Kylo Ren, the most amazing, talented, powerful, and dashing knight of the First Order, and his trusty sidekick, ravaging the countryside for riches and adventure!”

“Get OFF of me you absolute OAF!”

“Oh fair damsels, fear not, for my good sir here will serenade you whilst I slay the fearsome beasts,”

“How infuriating can you BE, I am NOT your sidekick-!” 

“The world could be ours.” Kylo turned then, finding his nose just inches away from Hux’s blushed and befreckled one, as the air between them seemed to freeze. Kylo’s eyes fell, embarrassment creeping up his cheeks as well as he let Hux push himself out of his arm. 

“I think I’ll be a rogue.” Hux stammered out, willing the flush to leave his face. His erratic complexion truly hadn’t been an issue until this mountain had invaded his life. 

“Really?” Kylo looked immediately on task again, a complete switch from mere seconds ago. “I’ll be honest, I kinda pegged you as a wizard”

Hux’s nose crinkled at the thought, “Not much for the magic I’m afraid, why complicate things when there’s a simpler way to do it? I don’t want to have to rely on anything but myself and my wits.”

“Huh. Whatever, magic is cool, but so are rogues I guess.” He leans forward, throwing his hair in a quick messy bun before grabbing the Player’s Handbook to start the character process. It really was amazing what such a simple thing did for the look of the man, Hux mused. Not nearly up to his standards of course, but he supposed he could see the rugged charm of it-

“HUX. Earth to Hux. Do you copy?” 

“What?” he snapped. It wasn’t fair, he knew, but he didn’t care at this point. If Kylo was bothered by it, he didn’t show.

“You have to pick a race, too. I was thinking gnome, they can be pretty fun for sneaking around,”

“I’d rather be of a more average height, I think.”

“Right. Well then you’ve got elves, tieflings, dragonborns,”

“How about human?” 

Kylo’s face fell. “Really? You can be anything in the entire fantasy world, and you want to be a human? News flash bud, you already are one!” His tone is obviously teasing, but his words still sting Hux as he puts up those icy walls he never seems to run out of.

“It just makes the most sense, I want him to blend in but still be imposing, he doesn’t need to be fancy, some of us are just as happy to get a job done without the dramatics.” He let the ice seep into those last words, challenging Kylo, who didn’t take the bait. 

“Okay okay fine, I won’t dissuade you if that’s really what you want, but there is this one race called Kalashtar that’s like a human but they also have dream spirits within them, it’s a little cooler at least and you still look pretty human.” Kylo didn’t know why he cared so much about this, but he did. He wanted Hux to have fun.

Hux grabbed the book from Kylo, Eberron, it said, and read through it quickly. “That’ll work.” It was an interesting race after all, and still fit with all his reasonings. He looked back up to see Kylo with a confused look on his face. “What’s wrong.”

“I just smell something, kind of like laundry detergent, but I haven’t done laundry yet, so it’s throwing me,”

“Clean linen?” 

“How the hell am I supposed to know what that smells like?”

“Dear lord, it smells like this,” Hux shoved his hand at Kylo’s nose, where he had applied that lotion of his earlier. When he was still convincing himself this had any semblance to a meeting. Kylo took a deep breath in, staying silent as he processed the smell. Hux suddenly felt very silly, hand shoved in front of Kylo’s face like that and yanked it back.

“I prefer vanilla.” Hux blanched. The gall of this man was beyond him. 

“Well then, I suppose it’s a good thing I don’t care.”

“I never said you had to.” Kylo stuck Hux with an exasperated look, as if Hux was the immature one in this particular scenario. He bristled, “We’re almost done, all right?”

Finishing the character was actually pretty fun, and Kylo went through the basics of the campaign setting. “Phasma runs it, she’s the only one with the stomach for DMing, but she’s actually really good at it! Right now we’re acting as a special strike force for King Snoke, he’s this wrinkly old d-bag whose offering us metric shit tons of gold to steal some artifact from a dragon. Maybe he hired you to keep an eye on us, so you tag along? We can talk to Phasma about it, but that might make the most sense.”

“Right, I look forward to it then.” Hux was surprised to find he wasn’t lying about it either, as silly as it seemed, this could actually be fun. And seeing Kylo so excited about something was almost, dare he say it, cute.


	4. Anger Issues

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An unexpected visitor shows up and interrupts game night, reminding Hux of the real reason he had gotten a job in the first place. Kylo isn’t impressed, and proceeds to do what Kylo does best (break things).

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took so long! Depression really be wildin, and no I will never post at any time other than 2AM.

_The trusted General of King Snoke blended seamlessly within the crowded streets of Trimstead, trailing the misshapen party of nobodies his King had hired on a whim. And of course, to preserve the integrity of the agreement, he was sent to trail these individuals to ensure their loyalty to the agreement presented. The job was beneath him, and yet his skills he knew made him best suited for the task. Everyone knows the King, nobody knows the General, and so his ability to slip between gazes led him once again to dreaded field work. Though, he must admit, the reprieve from the dull some paperwork was perhaps a needed one-_

_“Why are you following us?” A slight girl clad in luminescent white robes peered up at the startled man, hand hovering over wooden staff. Maybe he was a tad bit rusty then. His mind worked fast, for when the body fails the mind remains and ensures he portrays the utmost confidence in his demeanor._

_“I was hired to aid you, by the generous King Snoke. I was unsure of how to properly approach so I followed waiting for a good moment, but you seemed to have created that yourself.” She looked skeptical, still, but producing a writ from the King himself was enough to dissuade her at the time being._

_“What’s your name, then?” A man with a wicked looking bow slung across his back stepped forward, shadowed by a tall man draped in layers of black cloth that seemed to pin with his stare anything he caught init. Still, it was an easy enough question to answer even to a group as peculiar as this. ___

__“Armitage Hux”_ _

__The whole table startled, shocked out of their immersion by a voice that condescendingly addressed the room without a hint of embarrassment or remorse. No one had so much as heard the shop’s bell ring, even from the back it should have alerted them of a customer. He was a sturdy man, with attractive features and dark hair that seemed to have been swept upward by a strong wind. He stood with his weight shifted on one leg, staring at Hux as if no one else was there._ _

__“That would be my name, now to what do I owe the pleasure?” He stood, and Kylo did too, who took a step forward in an almost menacing stance before Hux shot him a warning glance and gestured for him to stop._ _

__“Name’s Poe. Think you can spare me a quick chat? Outside. Then you can get back to your, ahem, little game.”_ _

__“I don’t know who you think you are, but we’re closed-”_ _

__“Certainly.” Hux interrupted Kylo, stepping past him and keeping his eyes glued ahead. He was swift, sharp, efficient, one could almost see the guarded walls being built back up in Hux’s mind. He wasn’t daft, he had been half expecting a visit concerning the money but still he hoped it wouldn’t be so soon. He took in as much as he could from the visual; the man’s worn down jacket, the firearm that lay poorly concealed, the lax way he held himself. Probably some sort of hired enforcer, with any luck he could squeeze some information of the nature of his blackmailer’s identity. Information won wars, that much he knew, and just because he had let himself grow comfortable in the past month didn’t mean he wasn’t ready for battle. He stood still, silent, letting Poe make the first move, which he didn’t wait long to take._ _

__“You owe us some money.”_ _

__“My father owed you money. He’s cut off all ties with me, so if you were hoping for access to his funds then I’m afraid I can’t help you.”_ _

__“My boss don’t care where the money comes from, you own him money.”_ _

__“And who would your boss be, exactly? My father, unfortunately, was quite popular in your types of circles.” He took a step forward, using every inch he had on this man to his advantage._ _

__“Look. You got a month. Tops. You get the money, or you deal with whatever hell Hutt’s gunna put ya through. My advice?” Poe took a step forward to match Hux’s, up into his face and dropped his voice to a harsh whisper. “Rob a bank. Blackmail a celebrity. You do what you have to and get the damn money.” He held Hux’s stony gaze for another icy moment before turning and stalking away, mounting a motorcycle and driving off. Hux just watched, stiff, as his mind reeled sorting through what he had just heard. He wasn’t even close to the 200,000 that was being demanded, and while he had known that having years to pay it off was wishful thinking he had hoped to perhaps get a little more time than that. One month? That was hardly anything. It was time to get creative._ _

__“He gone? Are you okay, did he bother you? How’d he even get in, the door was locked.” Kylo stormed out, finding Hux standing alone outside the shop. “I can beat him up, you know, I’m really strong and all it wouldn’t even be hard I bet.”_ _

__“No. Kylo, I appreciate everything you’ve done for me with this job, but I need you to leave this be.” He looked at Kylo with that same distant stare he used when he distanced himself from his emotions. “Frankly, it’s not your business.” He let the sting seep into that phrase. He didn’t like seeing Kylo upset, but this wasn’t something he could afford to worry about feelings for. But instead of shutting Kylo down, it seemed to do the opposite._ _

__“Like hell it’s not my business, that man broke into my shop!”_ _

__“Actually, that’s your uncle’s shop.”_ _

__“That’s not the point!” He was yelling now, a force Hux had only seen once and it was directed at a patron being disrespectful to Rey. All that anger then pointed towards him, well, that was an entirely different beast that Hux found himself unprepared for._ _

__“You are my coworker Kylo! What say do you have in my associates and business?”_ _

__“I know people like that, you think I didn’t see the gun? Tell me, what the hell have you gotten yourself into Hux?”_ _

__“Nothing I can’t handle.”_ _

__“LIAR!” And he lunged, grabbing a fistful of Hux’s shirt to pull him in, Hux swore his eyes were glowing in this frenzy he had worked himself into. Hux stumbled a moment before regaining his balance with one hand clenched around the wrist that held his dark blue polo._ _

__“Put. Me. Down.” Hux spoke slowly, as if Kylo was a wild animal. Perhaps the analogy wasn’t too far off._ _

__“YOU THINK YOU CAN HANDLE ANYTHING HUX, BUT YOU AREN’T IMMORTAL! THIS, THIS HIS HOW PEOPLE GET KILLED! AND DAMN YOU, BUT YOU AREN’T ALLOWED TO DIE YET!” Spit flew at Hux’s face as he tried to push away at Kylo’s unyielding form, taken aback by the sheer force of the man’s anger. They’re noses practically touched, and it was all Hux could do to keep his gaze locked onto the man’s eyes and not trailing from freckle to freckle._ _

__“Kylo, you need to go inside.” Rey and Finn had appeared, and Rey had a hand placed on Kylo’s shoulder. Her voice was soft, but strengthened by steel that seemed to cut through whatever cloud of anger had taken over Kylo’s mind. He looked from Hux to Rey, then pushed Hux back a few steps before storming into the shop, the bell ringing angrily behind him. The three of them stood there a moment as Hux caught his breath. That was terrifying, but Hux was more afraid of how much he had enjoyed seeing Kylo worked up. He was a monster in a man’s clothing, all power and danger pointed directly at him. He looked between Rey and Finn, an awkward silence ensuing as no one seemed to know how to follow that up._ _

__“So, uhm. That Poe guy, he was kinda cute.” Finn piped up, a half smile cracking on his face that disappeared as the intense, disapproving glares of Rey and Hux lasered onto him. “Right, okay. Off limits then.”_ _

__Hux sighed. He really did regret having brought someone like Poe to these people, as much as he knew it wasn’t truly his fault. “I think it would perhaps be best for me to go home, I don’t think I will be in a proper mindset for playing today.” His statement was accentuated by a loud crash and an anguished yell that came from inside the shop._ _

__“Shit, not again- yeah, I think we all need a cooler.” She ran into the store, and Finn gave Hux an apologetic look._ _

__“He’s got some anger stuff going on,” Finn explained._ _

__“You don’t say?”_ _

__“It really doesn’t come out often, he just needs some space. Rey’s the only one who can even get close to him when he’s like this.”_ _

__“Poor girl,” Hux teased, and Finn took the opportunity to laugh and lighten the mood a bit. “I should head home, I’ve got some, things, I need to sort out.”_ _

__“Right! Well, I’ll see ya next time, then.”_ _

__Hux gave a small smile before turning towards his car. There would not be a next time, not in the next month at least, and maybe not even ever. He had let himself grow sloppy, and had nearly gotten these people involved in something that was actually dangerous. Hux knew how to handle himself, he was raised for it, but these people grew up on movie nights and board games. As for Kylo, well. He wasn’t sure what exactly he was feeling, but he knew that it was time to lock it up far, far away to keep him out of it. But even as he came to that revelation, Hux could only halfway convince himself it was for Kylo’s sake, and not his own._ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You’re comments really do mean the world to me! Thanks to everyone supporting the story so far, and thanks for being patient. I really just want to let it unfold how it does, but this slow burn do be pretty damn slow


	5. It started out as a kiss;

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> HERE IT IS!!!! THE ONE AND ONLY FAKE BOYFRIENDS TROPE THAT I LOVE MORE THAN LIFE! GET IT WHILE IT’S HOT, BOYS!!!!

For all intents and purposes, Armitage Hux dropped off the face of the planet. Confined to his one person apartment, he schemed of ways to raise the much needed funds. He hadn’t taken it seriously enough, and now it was biting him. He could practically feel his father's disappointment from the grave over how he brushed off his worries to hang out with some cute boy. Now his living space was a frantic spider web of strings, news clippings, and notes on anything and anything he could connect to the Hutt Cartel as well as potential ways to score quick cash. And though he lamented missing class and even his odd little job, at least Millicent was satisfied with the extra attention.

There really wasn’t an easy way to procure $200,000, so already he was figuring a plan of how to pull off such an impossible feat. He had thought about making an appeal to the First Order, but CEO Snoke would sooner hire a hitman on the cast out heir than lend him a hand. Apparently bank robbing wasn’t nearly as fruitful as the movies made it seem, which left him with researching what sorts of local celebrities he could try to extort. The list was disparagingly short, and after a frantic few days of amassing his options he was coming up with nothing. He plopped on the couch exhausted, three day old coffee sitting on the small table suddenly looking more than inviting. He needed to sleep. Just a wink, maybe a few hours then he’d get back to it, he could spare himself that-

“Hux? I know you’re in there I’m not stupid.” A series of loud bangs on the door accompanied the call. “Open up you twat.”

Each pound of the door went straight to Hux’s now raging headache as the insufferable voice of Kylo called in through the door. He groaned, flopping back onto the ratty couch and deciding to wait him out. He couldn’t stand out there forever.

“Hux, I swear to god I will break down your door. I’ll do it, and you know I will too.”

He knew he would. That crazy son of a bitch really would and Hux did not have the money to pay for a crushing debt and a broken door. Cursing, he raised himself from his spot and opened the door as much as the locked chain would allow, peering at Kylo from the gap. 

“Hux!” Kylo’s face immediately lit up, a childish grin taking over his worried stare. “Wow, you really look like shit. Let me in!” 

“Ah- what are you doing here? I sent in my resignation to Luke.” 

“Yeah, and I ripped it up before he saw it. Now let me in, I have to talk to you.”

“You what?”

“Hux!”

Hux drew a long breath, locking his anger in his jaw before slamming the door to unlock it and let Kylo in. He stormed into the apartment breathlessly, pacing as he started rambling. “So I tracked that Poe guy, he seemed pretty sketchy but I did figure out that apparently it’s the Hutt Cartel that wants your money? I dunno if you knew that already but- jeez Hux this place is a mess, is this seriously where the famous front desk color coder lives? How old’s this coffee?” He turned to Hux, catching his breath with an almost crazy look in his eyes, as if he was excited by the entire predicament.

“Kylo Ren, every day I’ve known you I’ve been just a little more convinced that you were dropped on your head as a child, but this really takes the cake in just proving me right!” Hux could feel his thin layer of patience was already ripped to shreds, and dear lord it really did feel good to have someone there to yell at. “You followed him? Where? WHY? Are you honestly trying to get yourself killed?”

“Well yeah. I mean the dropped on my head thing, Dad was clumsy and my ma caught it on video.” Kylo scowled a little at the memory, lips screwing up in a way that demanded Hux’s attention. That ridiculous statement alone was enough to stop Hux in his tracks, who just stared at Kylo in utter confusion for an awkward moment. Eventually he had enough, giving a resigned sigh he flopped down onto the couch.

“Well, go on then, you didn’t barge in here for nothing.”

“Right, well”

“Don’t sit on my table” Hux snapped right as Kylo sat himself on the glass foot table in front of him.

“What- really? Why?”

“There is a perfectly good couch here for your perfectly good ass, so get off my table!”

“Aww, you like my ass?” At this Hux short circuited. He did. He really did.

“Are you going to tell me why you’re here or not?”

“So, I followed that Poe guy a bit, got some answers out of him about what you’ve gotten yourself into, and that it’s connected to the Hutt Cartel.”

“Right right, none of this is new here, my father’s a bastard who left me in a bad situation.”

“Yeah, but without access to your father’s fortune, which based on this mess of an apartment you don’t have, you either need to gain access or go into hiding.”

“Where am I supposed to hide against the Hutts? Even someone like you must know that’s a bad idea.” Hux was growing more and more sure this man was just wasting his time. Even so, it was admittedly a nice distraction.

“I mean you could go to the police, maybe get into witness protection?”

“Absolutely not, that destroys any semblance of suspense this story has.”

“What?”

“Nothing.”

“Whatever, I did have another idea but you’re not going to like it.” Kylo angled himself towards Hux, who noticed a slight blush in his cheeks and immediately went on guard. “My mom’s kind of a big deal I guess, and her place has got top security. Part of her being a senator and then my dad just being a generally scummy guy, it’s basically a fortress. Spring Recess is coming up, so we could go there to buy you some extra time.”

Hux raised an eyebrow, unsure as to what about this plan he wasn’t going to like. It actually seemed pretty good, a place with solid protection he could hole up until he found a way to scrape up the cash. “Well? What’s the catch, there’s always a catch.”

“Umm, well you see, my parents don’t really let me bring friends over. They like to keep the house only available to people close to us that we trust…” He trailed off, suddenly very interested in the assortment of collectible mugs Hux had hanging in his kitchen.

“So, what? I can’t come then?”

“No, it’s just… youdhavetocomeasmyboyfriendorsomething” Ren’s cheeks were flaming red, staring at Hux now almost defensively. Hux froze. He couldn’t have heard that right, was the man he’d been crushing on for the past month now just asked him out? His head was spinning, he hardly heard Kylo as he started rambling on, “obviously it would be fake, right? But like then there’s my family who can be a little overbearing sometimes so we might have to try a little bit but it doesn’t have to, you don’t have to if you don’t want to it’s just an idea,”

Hux couldn’t hold it back anymore. He was sleep deprived and loopy, stressed to the max and here this oaf just waltzed in and started rambling in that infuriatingly cute way and he didn’t even notice as his body just leaned forward and cut Ren off with a hungry kiss, who melted into it with a little gasp of surprise and brought his hand up to Hux’s jaw, a gentle touch that seemed so out of character for an explosive man like Ren but everything about him was soft, from his lips to the roll of his shoulders to the way he let Hux just push into him. It was heaven, exactly like he had imagined it.

Hux brought a hand up to that thick black hair, suddenly he needed to know what it felt like and to his delight he heard Ren’s light moan at the as the two pressed themselves closer, gods, he was kissing Kylo Ren, he was-

Hux broke away quickly, the two disheveled men staring at the other with a tense air of confusion and excitement. 

“You were just, ahem, talking quite a lot and, I’m not sure what came over me, I’m a bit tired actually so fake boyfriends, that should work. You know, ahha, just until we figure out the money thing, so I actually should really get some sleep now you never know what’ll happen when you’re, well, tired I suppose.” It was Hux’s turn to ramble, as he quickly stood to show Kylo out who for once went along without protest. 

Before Hux had a chance to shut him out, he stuck a foot between the door and the frame. “So then, this never happened?”

“Nope! So sorry! I’m just, quite tired you see! Goodbye!” If Hux wasn’t so flustered, he might have seen the brief flash of hurt that flash across his face before the door slammed shut. 

“Right, then. Bye Hux.” Kylo whispered to the closed door, beginning his trudge back to his car to sleep on the wild turn this night had taken.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know, I’m a heathen who doesn’t update often. ily guys :)

**Author's Note:**

> I’m going to try to update as often as I can! I’m having a ton of fun with it so far and any feedback you can spare would honestly mean so much! Thanks for reading!


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